Fearlessness...

Fear drives me.  It drives me in everything I do.  I could give examples from every role I play as father, son, teacher, student, coach...

Acknowledging fear is like turning a light on in a dark room - I think I heard that once in a yoga class, and I know I've said it before in my class.  Awareness brings light to fear so that it's not as scary.

Yet still fear persists, creeping in when tired and late at night or moments of doubt.  Or in moments of conflict, it rears it's head like a fire breathing dragon that can spew words of anger if provoked or threatened.

On our spring break lacrosse trip to St. Pete Beach, we woke up every morning for a 7am team dip; we called it polar bear despite the warm temps in the Gulf of Mexico.  I woke up extra early and meditated before the bleary-eyed boys arrived on the sandy beach.  One morning after reading the daily Living Yoga 365 email on fearlessness - I meditated on fear.  Fear of failure.  Fear of failing as a coach (as a teacher, father, etc.)

When the boys stumbled out, I asked that they sit for five minutes (if it was 15 they'd fall asleep), and think about what they fear, and realize that fear comes from love being threatened.   We love to win; we fear losing.  We love success; we fear failure.  We love to look good; we fear looking bad.  We love our family; we fear losing them or disappointing them.

The boys spread out along the beach and sat for a few minutes.  And then they jumped in the gulf, running in by class.  Who knows whether they meditated or what they thought... but if it begins the process of awareness - it's a step forward.

Fear can paralyze us.  On the field, a player avoids taking risks, afraid to make mistakes.  We learn from our mistakes so we can't be afraid to make them.  Fear then becomes a players friend, if tamed, to motivate and instruct.

I am afraid I have to cut this short - this has been a good writing meditation for me. Thank you for reading  - I need to write today.

Best,

Kevin