Remember that this meditation thing, this full wheel back bend thing, this full arm balance thing, this split thing, this ____ thing is not going to happen over night. In fact, it may never "happen" at all. What will happen though, with a lot of "will" power, is improvement.
What if you were really angry with someone? What if someone really "hurt" you? So, in your wisdom from this year of Living your Yoga you sit in Loving Kindness meditation and send that little rat your loving kindness. May they be happy (ugh). May they be healthy (grr). May they be at peace (really?)...
So, you deem it fruitless and frustrating.
But the magic sauce isn't made instantaneously. The awakening and the softening doesn't happen with one little metta meditation. Go back to the Buddha. If it took him umpteen days and nights to become fully enlightened, why would you even put that much pressure on yourself to think that you could transform hate/anger/resentment/rage/guilt/grief into anything close to love in one sitting?
Of course, no effort is ever wasted... so sit. And sit. And sit. And sit. Ad nauseum, or maybe ad happiness. Each time trying to improve. Each time doing your best.
Be receptive.
--Charry
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